Wanna fight?

I have a load of thoughts whizzing around my head. I feel an ache for the lonely, disenfranchised, hurting, depressed. These words struck me while I was watching some of a DVD with my son last night:

"Look, I'm not the one with the problem, ok? It's the world that seems to have a problem with me. They take one look at me and go,"Ahh look a big, stupid, ugly ogre." They judge me before they even know me and that's why I'm better off alone." Shrek

This somehow connects me to "you don't know me"? See my blog on 19/9/05.

I heard a suggested definition of social capital last year: "how many people know your name?"

Now turn it around - what's your postman called? The newsagent from who you buy a paper? The office cleaner? Your neighbour?

It also chimes with the life of Rosa Parks and her refusal in 1955 to give her bus seat to a white man. What an impact she made on the course of civil rights history. She wasn't known that day, except for her colour.

We draw near to Remembrance Day. We honour the Unknown soldier and the sacrifice made.

Thoughts whizzing... thinking still about Garry... taking his own life.

Talking to a friend yesterday about depression affects women, she said: you would be amazed to know how many women go through depression due to childhood traumas … subsequently struggling with acceptance, affection, approval, self-worth, self-esteem...resulting in self-mutilation, eating disorders. Even suicide.

Discussing with the guys that I meet midweek what is important to us in friendship. How we may be reticent to ask for help. How we may be equally slow to offer it?

I wonder then, following, the film quote beneath…

• What am I fighting for?
• Who am I fighting for?
• How am I doing in that?

Questions, questions. Not too many answers presently... which leaves me feeling... bereft of human warmth. Like... I need contact. So, if you are reading and thinking, maybe leave a comment? Talk to me goose...