Overwhelmed?

Was thinking today about what being overwhelmed means?

The dictionary says:
[1] overpower, esp. emotionally.
[2] Defeat by force

Re [1] - I imagined being overwhelmed to be moments of extreme pressure and, because too much was happening at once, to be unable to cope, function, or think straight.

I haven't changed my mind on that except for the context of my definition, or is it an interpretation? Either way, I have typically assumed the pressure to be from external circumstances - the stuff I talked about in September:

The treadmill - the pressure I feel at the lowest point of my day - when I'm tired from work and haven't yet eaten - the interruptions that can cause me to explode - "can I have a drink? I'm hungry what's for dinner. Look at this! Dad...come here a minute please".

I have been reminded today that to be overwhelmed can be due to internal pressures too, particularly in times of real trauma - bereavement, diagnosis of terminal illness, major health issues, being made redundant, marriage breakdown etc. Sounds obvious, ne?

But what of the feelings that can overwhelm us daily.

If you stopped to think and analyse it, how often in a day do we experience (in no particular order and to name only a few) fear, panic, prevarication, isolation, desperation. I have realised that for me a combination of feelings, or even a single emotion, can leave me frozen inside with simply no sense of feeling anything. Isn't that another form of being overwhelmed?

Perhaps the second definition Defeat by force is applicable here. Because that state of being frozen means, in effect, that I am not able to function. I am defeated - "at a loss" in everyday language, even if only momentarily.

Have any of the following ever happened to you? Hearing bad news and grinning - it's like a nervous reaction. Being near someone who is crying and wanting to run away. Being in a train carriage with a few noisy youths and feeling panicky ... threatened. Being in a lift feeling trapped. Having to talk to someone you don't know and wanting to run and hide.

Being overwhelmed for me can take various forms and be caused be any number of things. Even compliments can be very confusing!!

The good news for today is that, having concluded that I have a heart of stone, because I often seem to feel nothing in some situations, perhaps, after all, I am feeling so much... it is... too much? Overwhelming.

All I need to do now ... is figure out what to do about it !!!!

If this sounds familiar please leave a message. Anon is fine. Dan x